Short funny car jokes

Here is a joke from the court of a large mid-western city.

Here is a funny excuse for speeding.

James and Rosa were speeding down the road. A police car pulled them over.

"Why on earth were you driving so fast?" the policeman yelled.

"Our brakes are no good-so we wanted to get there before we had an accident!"

Josh, a friend of mine, hour-and-a-half commute to work got old quickly, the time spent stuck in traffic was sending him over the edge. So I was happy for him when he found a new job closer to home.

"That's great," I said. "What are you doing now?"
"I'm a bus driver."

A blond lady was driving along the highway when a blond police officer pulled her over for speeding.

Officer: May i see your license?
Lady: What does it look like?
Officer: its a rectangular stuff with a photo of yours on it.
The lady looks through her bag and pulls out her compact mirror and hands it to the officer.

the train guard and the girl
A guard was going to signal his train to start when he saw a hot girl standing on the platform by an open door, talking to another pretty girl inside the carriage.
"Come on, miss!" he shouted. "Close the door, please!"
"Oh, I just want to kiss my sister goodbye," she called back.

You are driving tooooo close, if you can read this bumper sticker.