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January 2010

I want bigger tits

admin on Sun, 01/31/2010 - 10:10

A guy and his girlfriend are in their bedroom and the girl says to her boyfriend, "I hope I had bigger tits".

The boy says, "Well what I recommend is to get some toilet tissue and rub it between your tits for two months".

"How will that help to make my tits bigger?" asks the girl.

"Well it worked for your ass" says the boy.

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一对情侣在他们的卧室，女的对她男朋友说，“我好想要一对大咪咪”。

男孩说， “哦，我建议你用手纸不断的擦你的咪咪，不出2个月，肯定变大！”

“那也可以吗？” 女孩问道。
“我想可以，至少对你屁股是有效的！” 男孩回到道。

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37 comments

adult

Title: A creative WC

Comments: 7

Tags:
painting

7 comments

Who wants to go to Heaven?

admin on Sat, 01/30/2010 - 10:10

a joke from a church

Sunday School teacher: Hands up all those who want to go to Heaven?　… What about you, Olav? You haven't got your hand up, don't you want to go to Heaven?

Olav: I can't, My mum told me to go straight home.

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一个在教堂的笑话
主日学校的教员：谁想去天堂，就举起手来。……你呢，奥拉维？你还没举手呢，特里，难道你不想去天堂吗？
噢拉维：我去不了，因为妈妈让我一放学就回家。

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27 comments

kids

Swiss tank

admin on Fri, 01/29/2010 - 11:45

2 comments

The dog understands music

admin on Fri, 01/29/2010 - 10:10

Little Josh was practicing his violin, in the meanwhile, his father sat reading the newspaper.

The dog of Josh began to howl along dismally. Finally, the father could endure the combination no more and said, "Can't you play something the dog doesn't know?"

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小乔治在家里练习小提琴，这时他的父亲在读报纸。

随着乔治的琴声，他家里养的狗也开始高一声低一声的叫起来。最后，小男孩的父亲实在忍不下去了，说，“难道你就不能拉一些狗听不懂的曲子吗？”

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39 comments

kids

My umbrella was lost

admin on Thu, 01/28/2010 - 10:10

A guy, who is staying in a hotel, left his umbrella in the hall, but he had put on the handle a card on which was written, "This umbrella belongs to a gentleman who can lift up a hundred pounds. I shall be back in ten minutes."

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住在旅馆的一位绅士，把他的雨伞放在了大厅里，不过他在伞柄上系了一张卡片，上面写道，“此伞属于一位能举百磅的绅士。我将在十分钟内回来。当他回来时，发现雨伞已经不翼而飞，取而代之的是另一张卡片，上面写着：“此卡是一位一小时能跑十英里的人留下的，我将永远不回来了。”

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17 comments

hilarious

An absent-minded prof

admin on Wed, 01/27/2010 - 10:10

an absent-minded professor with his wife

Absent-minded Professor: Oh, Jesus! Where is my wallet!
His wife: Didn't you feel a hand in your pocket?
Absent-minded Professor: Yes, but I thought it was mine.

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心不在焉的教授：噢，上帝！我的钱包不见了！
妻子：你难道没感觉到一只手伸进你的口袋？
心不在焉的教授：感觉到了，可我还以为那是我的手呢。

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8 comments

hilarious

A lion with his mistress

admin on Tue, 01/26/2010 - 10:10

Night is felling on the African savanna, there is a lion playing with his mistress - a zebra. Suddenly, he find his wife, a lioness is slowly walking towards him!
"Quickly!" He roars at fellow players, "Pretend that I'm eating you!"

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夜色降临南非大草原，一只狮子正干劲十足地开始要和他的情妇－一只斑马交尾。忽然，他发现家里那只母狮正慢慢走来！
“快！”他急忙狮吼道，“假装我正要吃你！”

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